Amy Grant - Grown-Up Christmas List

This is my wish for Christmas. As things eventually break or run out and more is needed to replace it. But this is the type of gift one really must have.

twisting words, words to twist

I've been writing again, sometimes my mind gets a little busy, thinking so many things at once. They all fly around in there and sometimes colliding into each others. Making sense on somethings , then others things are screwed around
I was playing around today and wrote a few things that I found quite different Same words but opposite message and meaning. I hope you can see what I mean. :)

We all know the saying .
A place for everything and everything in their place. 

But I came up with some of my own thoughts and sayings. 
These are just ones I did today.....

Love somebody, somebody loves you

You can't believe what you see, but you don't have to see to believe.

Live to breathe, but breathe to live... ( if you can understand that one) remember where the breath of life comes from.

Live simply, don't just simply live

Know what to say, don't just say what you know

Think about what to say, but don't always say what you think.

Don't live to believe, Believe to live 

Don't just live to love, but love to live....

Just a few of them, I have a lot more but haven't gotten them done yet.
If you can't figure some out then let me know here, I can try to explain or someone else can share what they see.

twisted questions, questions twisted.

twisted questions, questions twisted.

my ankle is injured, i injured my ankle.  ( so i had time to write these.) 

Questions to answer. answer to questions.

More twists to be said, as I've said some twists. 8-16-2010

twisted thinking, thinking twisted....

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HAVE I SPOKE TO BUILD OR DESTROY WITH WHAT I SPOKE?

WILL I TRY HARDER TO STOP MY FROWN, OR WILL I JUST FROWN WHEN IT'S HARD

WILL I TRY MY HARDER TO SMILE ? OR, CAN I SMILE WHEN LIFE GETS HARD?

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Questions to answer.,  answers to questions.

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8-16-2010 WRITTEN THIS MORNING WHILE WAITING ON MY RIDE.......

1. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TO SAY? OR DO YOU SAY WHAT YOU KNOW?

2 AM YOU THE BEST AT WHAT YOU DO? OR, DO YOU DO WHAT IS BEST. ?

3. ARE YOU GOOD AT WHAT YOU KNOW ? OR, DO YOU DO WHAT IS GOOD?

4. DO YOU SPEAK TO BUILD UP? OR, DO YOU BUILD ON WHAT DO YOU BUILD ON WHAT YOU SPEAK?

5. DO YOUR WORD HEAL? OR, DO YOU HEAL THE THE WORD?

6. DO YOU SPEAS IN LOVE ? OR, DO YOU LOVE TO SPEAK?

7. GOSSIP IS ABOUT LIES. DO YOU LIE TO GOSSIP?

8. GOSSIP CAN HOLD ONTO YOU. DO YOU HOLD ONTO GOSSIP?

9. do you walk the walk, do you talk the talk.? ( this is the one everyone has heard)I say .. ( DO YOU WALK THE TALK, DO YOU TALK THE WALK ) think about it, you'll understand...

10   DO YOU FOLLOW THE LEADER? OR, DO YOU LEAD THE FOLLOWER.?

11. CAN I HEAL OTHERS HURTS, DO I ALLOW THEM TO HEAL ME?

12. DO YOU HEAR WHAT YOU SAY? OR , SAY WHAT YOU HEAR?

13. DO YOU DO WHAT YOU SAY/ OR, DO YOU SAY WHAT YOU DO?

14. ARE YOU LIFTING OTHER UP? OR, ARE THEY LIFTING YOU ?

15. DO YOU WAKE UP IN MORNINGS  ? OR DO THE MORNINGS WAKE YOU UP ? ( different from getting out of bed, in waking up)

16. DO YOU CONTROL YOUR HABITS ? OR, DO YOUR HABITS CONTROL YOU ?

17. DO YOU LIVE TO DREAM ? OR, DREAM TO LIVE ?

18. DO YOU HAVE A JOB ? OR , DOES THE JOB HAVE YOU ?

19. DOES LIFE DEFINE YOU? OR, DO YOU DEFINE LIFE?

20. ARE YOU LEARNING FROM ME ? AM I LEARNING FROM YOU ?

21. ARE YOU HOLDING ONTO GOD, LIKE GOD WOULD HOLD ONTO GOD?

22. DO YOU PLAY GAMES? OR, AM I ALLOWING THE GAMES TO CONSUME (play) YOU?

23. I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU?, ARE YOU IN LOVE WITH ME?

24. DO YOU HURT OTHERS, THE WAY THEY HURT YOU?

25. YOU CAN DO NOTHING, IF NOTHING IS IN YOU

26. IT IS GOOD FOR YOU TO LAUGH, LAUGHING IS GOOD FOR YOU.

27. EVEN IF SOMEONE HITS YOU, DOESN'T MEAN YOU HAVE TO HITS BACK.

28. DOES THE WORLD TEACH YOU? OR, DO YOU TEACH THE WORLD?

29. WHEN SOMEONE BLESSES YOU, DO YOU BLESS SOMEONE?

30. DO YOU LIGHT UP LIFE? OR , DOES LIFE LIGHT UP YOU?

31. DO YOU HAVE A HEART OF BEAUTY? IS THERE BEAUTY IN YOUR HEART?

32. ARE PEOPLE BEAUTIFUL TO YOU? ARE YOU BEAUTIFUL TO PEOPLE?

33. IS LIFE BEAUTIFUL TO YOU? OR, DO YOU LIVE A BEAUTIFUL LIFE?

34. DO YOU HAVE GREED, OR DOES GREED HAVE YOU? ( i think i said this one last time another way)

35. DO YOU SEE THE NEEDY? OR, DO THE NEEDY SEE YOU?

36 DO YOU WALK BY THE POOR? DO THE POOR WALK BY YOU?

37. THERE ARE NEEDS TO BE FILLED, DO YOU FILL THOSE NEEDS?

38. DO YOU HIDE IN THE DARKNESS? OR, IS THE DARKNESS HIDING YOU?

39. DOES THE SUN SHINE ON YOU?, OR DO YOU ALLOW THE SON TO SHINE?

40. DO YOU GIVE GLORY TO GOD? OR DO YOU EXPECT THE GLORY TO BE GIVEN TO YOU?

41. ARE YOU NEEDING WHAT YOU HAV E? ARE YOU HAVING WHAT YOU NEED ?

42. ARE YOU ACCEPTING LIFE?, IS LIFE ACCEPTING YOU ?

43. CAN YOU DIE TO SELF? OR, IS YOUR SELF DYING IN YOU ?

44. IS YOUR WAY RIGHT? ARE YOU GOING THE RIGHT WAY?

45. ARE YOU CLEANING THE BLOOD AWAY ? OR IS THE BLOODING CLEANING YOU ?

46. CAN YOU INSPIRE SOMEONE ? , IS SOMEONE INSIRING YOU ?

47. IS YOU WORK HARD TO DO ? OR, DO YOU WORK HARD AT WHAT YOU DO ? 

48. DO YOU TELL PEOPLE WHAT TO DO ? OR, DO PEOPLE TELL YOU WHAT TO DO ?

49. DO PEOPLE TREAT YOU RIGHT ? DO YOU TREAT PEOPLE RIGHT ?

50. DO YOU LISTEN BEFORE YOU SPEA  K? OR, DO YOU SPEAK BEFORE YOU LISTEN ?

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AM I TWISTING WORDS ?  OR,   ARE THEY TWISTING ME ?, ( LOL)

HAVE I CONFUSED YOU, ARE YOU CONFUSED BY ME ?  They make sense to me. but what do I know , I just wrote them.

difficult questions, lol

Pondering Life's Difficult Questions

1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?

5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?

6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?

7. Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?

8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges?

9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there?

10. Why are they called " stands" when they are made for sitting?

11. Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"?

12. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?

13. Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites?

14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?

15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?

16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?

17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

20. Why is bra singular and panties plural?

21. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote controlwhen you know the batteries are dead?

22. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?

23. How come abbreviated is such a long word?

24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

25. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

26. Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one?

27. Christmas - What other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks?



20$$$ adds up with time

20 $$$   ( He wasn't thinking at the right moment)

TWENTY DOLLARS On their wedding night, the young bride approached her new husband and asked for $20 for their first lovemaking encounter.  In his highly aroused state, her husband readily agreed.For more than thirty years this scenario was repeated each time they made love, and her husband thought that it was a cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that she needed.

Arriving home in the middle of the day, she was surprised to find her husband drunk and highly upset.  He explained that his employer was going through corporate downsizing and he had been let go.  He felt it was unlikely that at fifty-nine he'd ever be able to find another position that paid anywhere near what he'd been earning, and declared that they were financially ruined.

Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which showed more than thirty years of steady deposits.  With interest, the total was nearly $1 million. Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued by the bank which were worth another $2 million. She explained that for the more than three decades she had "charged" him for sex, her savings and investments had multiplied and were worth over $3 million Her husband was so astounded he could barely speak.  When he finally he found his voice he blurted out, "If I'd had any idea what you were doing, I would have given you ALL my business!" 

That's when she shot him.

You know, sometimes, men just don't know when to keep their mouths shut.

dying art of proofreading

 Dying art of proofreading


Proofreading is a dying art, wouldn't you say?
Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter
before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!!! Editorial Room and asked who wrote this. It took two or three readings They put in a correction the next day.This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and called the Editor
I just couldn't help but send this along. Too funny...


Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
No crap, really? Ya think?
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Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Now that's taking things a bit far!
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Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
What a guy!
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Miners Refuse to Work after Death
No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-so's!
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Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
See if that works any better than a fair trial!
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War Dims Hope for Peace
I can see where it might have that effect!
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If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
Ya think?!
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Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Who would have thought!
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Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
They may be on to something!
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Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?
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Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
He probably IS the battery charge!
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New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Weren't they fat enough?!
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Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
That's what he gets for eating those beans!
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Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Do they taste like chicken?
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Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
Chainsaw Massacre all over again!
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Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
Boy, are they tall!
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And the winner is....


Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
Did I read that right?
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Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to
spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to
bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle).
We all need a good laugh, at least once a day!